Monday, March 7, 2011

the time i went to worcester

I'm a whore for the Real Housewives. I know that they're crazy, tacky, and totally gaudy. But if I'm being honest with myself, I'd be the same way if I had tons of money and nothing to do with it other than wipe my butt with it and throw it at homeless people.  I did watch the Real Housewives of Orange County, but I wasn't totally invested until they went to New York. How could I not be enthralled by crazy-eyed Ramona with her Pinot Grigio, Jill whose apartment decorating and color scheme that could easily send an epileptic into a fit, Alex and her pseudo-French children, and the Countess and her God-awful pop song that makes my ears bleed.

But then there's Bethenny. I have loved her from the very first episode. Her rapier wit never failed to make me laugh (and sometimes cringe). I actually was once involved in an argument with a friend who was Team Jill because SERIOUSLY? There's just no way! Jill was such a biatch to Bethenny! I even purchased a season pass for Bethenny Getting Married so I could watch it on my iPod on the way to work. Basically, I think that Bethenny is a hilarious, bad ass bitch. So when Juls asked if I wanted to see her when she came to Worcester my answer was OH HELL YES (apparently I say this a lot). I barely leave Somerville/Cambridge/Boston proper but this was definitely well worth the hour trip each way.

Juls made dinner reservations for us at Citizen Wine Bar and holy CRAP we had an awful experience. Don't worry, I made sure to document it all on Yelp. Because of their awful service my dinner consisted of almost an entire loaf of bread and a few pieces of cheese and salami. Oh, and half a bottle of wine. Tee hee. We refused to let a crappy dining experience ruin our night! We departed the restaurant, leaving the car in valet because, damnit they owed us that much, and made our way to the theater.

The show itself is pretty casual. I laughed so hard the entire time - especially when she asked if there were any straight, single men in the audience. When no one replied she yelled "If I were a straight man I'd be standing in the middle of this place in a red jumpsuit. This is vagina central! This is why MEN ARE STUPID!". Amen, Sista. She briefly discussed the other New York Housewives and talked about the Kelly Bensimon jellybean eating incident. She did plug her books pretty hard, but I can't say that I didn't expect that. While I do love her, I can't say that I necessarily agree with her diet views. I did greatly respect how she said that you need to find what works for you. Also, I was pretty amused when she compared eating fried calamari to having sex with Brad Pitt. Yep, homegirl went there. And I loved every minute of it.


Stephanie @ The Cookie Battle said...

HOW did I miss this? damn.

I love her.

M. said...

I really like her too. I almost bought Skinny Girl Margarita. I think I still will. I LOVE that her show is back on now too.

Kori said...

I'm so glad you posted about this. I am crazy jealous that you got to go. And that you used the phrase "rapier wit" in a blog post. LOVE Bethenny, and you, obvi.

Molly said...

You have made me LOVE I want to start rating every place I go.