Thursday, July 15, 2010

the bridesmaid saga: conclusion

I was going to wait until I had proper picture to show you from the wedding, really I was. But since that hasn't happened yet (it's on Saturday), and since I haven't blogged all week, I've decided to share with you the outcome of the saga. Here's the background story about the Russian seamstress who stripped me of my dignity. Yesterday I went (in the pouring rain, mind you) to go fetch my dress. When I arrived she threw the dress in my hands and said "You try on". It was not a question, it was a demand, and as such I scuttled into the fitting room before she could tell me how huge my ass had gotten in the two and a half weeks since I'd seen her.

To my shock and delight, the dress fit! I don't look like I'm wearing a circus tent, which is fantastic. I didn't have my strapless bra with me, and I was worried that she could comment on it, since she was so disappointed with my breasts last time around. Thankfully, I wasn't verbally assaulted this time around. Good thing, I'm not sure my self-esteem could have handled another round with her.

I'd like you to tkae notice of a few things:
  1. My bra, just chillin' out in the background. I was informed of this after I uploaded it to Facebook where all of my coworkers can see my pictures. Hey, at least they know I wear a bra?
  2. My work bag is spewing crap all over the floor. A little sampling of what my bag of tricks contained yesterday: Benadryl, a can of Progresso soup, a pair of socks, 3 packs of light blue Orbit gum and.. well, I think you get the point.
  3. My flip flops that I love and that are so disgusting that I'm almost, almost ashamed to wear them in public. About 1/8" of crappy rubber stands between me and walking barefoot when I've got those babies on. But damnit, they're comfortable.
  4. Finally, MY LARGER THAN STANDARD HIPS. That is all. 
EDIT: In my haste, I think I drew my hips a smiiiidge higher than they actually are. I would fix it but, meh, I am too lazy. Deal with it. 


    Mrs. Match said...

    Ugh, seamstress ladies are the worst! Mine at my wedding gown appointment was trying not to laugh at my less than adequate boobies. "You push boobies UP" she tells me.

    That's a cute dress, especially for a bridesmaid dress. Oh, and the cut of the dress is to blame for the hips, you look fantastic!

    Unknown said...

    i think it's a pre-req for seamstresses to be witchy!

    and thank you, after all the trauma, i think the dress did come out really nice!