Tuesday, August 4, 2009

the spanx return!

Everyone knows about my love/hate relationship with Spanx (I've mentioned them here, and here). They help me look beautiful and slim in my skirts but often end up embarrassing me on dates. Good to know that I'm not the only one. So for today's guest blog, I bring you a little tale from Jade, my pal from Vodka Phonics:

So even though Adam has seen me completely naked from very unflattering angles I still don't feel comfortable going Spanx-less in front of him in public. So I get within 20 minutes of his house and stop at my favorite McDonalds bathroom (classy, yes) to change out of my comfy driving clothes and into something that says "do me now." I get all the way into the McDonalds bathroom only to realize I forgot my spanx at home 5 hours away. I almost started crying. I had to run to Target and spend $30 on a new pair of Spanx. Now I need to return them because I already have 3 pairs but I'm embarrassed to hand over my used Spanx to the Target employee.

Later on we were getting pretty hot and heavy on the couch. I had already been uhh doing things to him for about 15 minutes and he goes "lets move to the floor" so we do that and he started unbuttoning my jeans. I had to make him turn around while he was sitting completely naked on the living room floor and face the wall while I took off my new Spanx. As you know, new Spanx are tight so I was standing up jumping up and down struggling to get out of my new Spanx TERRIFIED that he was going to turn around and see me looking like a sausage stuffed into my Spanx.

I've learned my lesson and I think that maybe losing 5lbs will just be easier than my ups and downs with Spanx.


Anonymous said...

If you're like me, you won't get rid of your Spanx even after you lose the 5 lbs. Spanx make every woman look better. Neither of the two boyfriends I've had in the time I've been wearing Spanx ever had any problem with them. Guys know about Spanx. It's not a big deal to them when they encounter them on a date. As long as an article of clothing is coming off, they don't care at all. And I do look much better in all of my dresses and skirts. I think that most women will find that the dating issue is just not a problem.

Nik said...

ah ha ha ha ha!!! you gals crack me up! only lose five if ya feel like it . . . otherwise spanx ON!!!!

Mrs. Match said...

I'm gonna have to check these out. Match has seen me at my worst, and still loves me, but it's the public I fret about. And pictures! These sound intriguing. So they really work?

And that is an awesome, super sexy image you've created. Sounds like me when I put on my sexy jeans that in no way fit anymore. Hahah!

Unknown said...

spanx are seriously AMAZING.