Saturday, April 25, 2009


Normally I am very respectful to my elders. But, sometimes I have to draw the line - and today was one of those days. I've been feeling sassy all day - as I gave some cat-callers and an asshole cabbie the finger while on my 11 mile run this morning. So really, this lady picked the wrong day and time to be a huge bitch to me.

So here's the story - we get on a VERY crowded green line train to head back home after a day spent downtown. There's this seemingly sweet older woman is making cheerful smalltalk with a middle-aged couple. The couple gets off my friends and I take their seats, with me directly next to said older woman. I'm sitting with my legs crossed, as any lady in a dress should. She leans over to me and says, with an attitude "Scuse me, your foot is almost touching my leg." My first reaction is "Oh I'm sorry!" and then I realize what it is she has said. First of all my feet aren't anywhere near her. Second of all, if they are, it's because she's so fat that she takes up more than her requisite space. And third of all, are you serious?

So I decide to screw with her and to continue to sit with my legs crossed, still nowhere near her. She begins speaking VERY loudly to her husband about how if I touch her, that she's going to "slam me in the head" and I better not get any closer or she'll have to "make me regret it." After a few minutes of listening to her irrational bitching I say "I AM NOT EVEN TOUCHING YOU." to which she replies "Get yo'self out of my conversation, you don't know what I'm talking about." and some other things that I wasn't paying attention to/didn't care about.

So when the T pulls into Lechmere station I get up and look at her and in my sweetest voice say "It was a pleasure riding next to you!!" She yells back "IT WAS A PLEASURE RIDING NEXT TO YO' MOMMA"

Oh, okay. Cool.


LindsB said...

I think I sat next to that same lady the other day. She started yelling at me because my magazine ALMOST came close to brushing her arm as I was turning the page- it was quite a joy to make her freak out the whole ride as I turned the pages really close to her. Oh, and when I got up someone who clearly had a mental problem sat down pretty much on top of her- made my day as I kept thinking about how that man was all up in her space bothering her.

Ugg, T-people suck!

Unknown said...

i love and hate crazy people on the T!